In a controversial election season, with less than two months until the big day, MOOYAH Burgers, Fries & Shakes announced a Bird Party nominee for this upcoming election: The Crandidate.

The Crandidate is an all natural Jennie-O turkey burger topped with real Swiss cheese, crispy fried onion strings, Ocean Spray whole berry cranberry sauce, crisp green leaf lettuce, and a touch of mayo.

Running on a platform centered on diners’ rights and condiment reform, Dallas-based better burger brand MOOYAH has found a way to capitalize on the presidential craze, while embracing the wackiness of this election season and remaining non-partisan.

According to the brand’s website, “Today many Americans are unhappy with the two major parties’ presidential candidates. Clearly, it is time for a Bird Party candidate. And that is why we are trotting out The Crandidate. He is left-wing and right-wing, making him the well-centered leader we all crave. Raised on a farm in Arkansas, The Crandidate comes from humble beginnings. Yet his family scratched and saved to send him to prep school at Eggxeter where he starred on the football team as a wingback. This success earned him a scholarship to Cranford University where he studied biochemistry, writing his senior thesis on the effects of tryptophan. He went on to law school at George Wattle University and has since enjoyed a successful private practice, most notably winning presidential pardons for clients on Thanksgiving Day.

Now, focusing his energy on a nation hungry for a better choice, The Crandidate graciously accepts the Bird Party’s nomination and pledges to end our nation’s squabbling and get us back to gobbling.”

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